Control Issues
by sockie1000
Summary: Steve decides to work on his control issues, starting with malasadas.  Rants and banter and fun, oh my! :D


Title: Control Issues

Author: sockie1000

Disclaimers: The usual. No ownership, no money. Yada, yada, yada. You know the drill.

Summary: Steve decides to work on his control issues, starting with malasadas. Rants and banter and fun, oh my! :D

****************************************H50***********************************

Danny looked up at the clock again, tapping his pen on the file opened on his desk. It was 8:12. Steve still was not in.

Danny wasn't worried. Not yet. But it was strange.

It was not like Steve to be late. And it certainly was not like Steve to be 15 minutes late, which was when he leisurely strolled in, seemingly without a care in the world, carrying a white bakery box.

"What's that?" Danny asked, nodding his head towards the box as Steve entered Danny's office.

"A box of malasadas from Leonard's."

"What are you doing with malasadas? I thought you didn't eat them in some vain attempt to live forever."

"Well, you have to die from something. And they are really good." Steve wiped his hand across his mouth, removing the incriminating sugar, and tossed the half-empty box onto Danny's desk, along with a stack of napkins.

Danny opened the box, took a bite out of a malasada, and leaned back in his chair. "So, is that why you were late? You got the sugar munchies on the way in?"

Steve perched himself on the edge of Danny's desk. "Nah. I was late because I slept in today."

Danny raised his eyebrows and stopped eating mid-chew. "You slept in? On a work day? What's wrong with you? Are you sick?"

"No. I'm not sick. I'm just taking it easy today. I even skipped my morning swim."

"Ok, now I know you're sick." Danny leaned back even father in his chair, away from Steve. "Do you have a fever? 'Cause if you do, just turn around walk out now." He pointed towards the door. "I have Grace this weekend and I'm not going to let you and your germs ruin that."

"Relax. I'm not sick. I've just been thinking about what you keep telling me. That I have some, well… you know…" Steve shrugged, "control issues."

Danny stared at Steve, his mouth agape.

"Uh, Danny," Steve gestured towards Danny's face, "you've got some food falling out of your mouth."

Danny hastily closed his mouth and swallowed the rest of the malasada, nearly choking. He coughed a few times before he was able to speak.

"Who are you, and what have you done with my partner?"

Steve rolled his eyes. "Very funny. I'm being serious here."

"Well then," Danny nodded, quickly recovering. "I'm seriously glad that you recognize you have control issues. Self-awareness is the first step on the journey of self-improvement."

"You really do read a lot of self-help books, don't you? You need to get a better hobby."

"My so-called hobby seems rather relevant right now, doesn't it?" Danny countered. "So stop deflecting and let's get back to the matter at hand. Now that you've recognized you have issues, have you come up with a plan to work on them?"

Steve shrugged again. "Well, not a plan, per se. I'm just going to take a few baby steps at first. Loosen up a bit, personally. Do things a little differently. See how that feels."

"Ok, then. Baby steps." Danny nodded, leaned forward, rested his elbows on his desk, and tapped his fingers together. "And when did you decide all this?"

"Last night."

Danny raised his eyebrows, nodded again, and pursed his lips. "OK. Let me see if I've got this straight. Last night you were your usual uptight, control freak self, and suddenly this morning you are a changed man, who's sleeping in, skipping exercise, coming to work late, and eating fried lard balls coated in sugar? Do I have that right?"

Steve smirked. "Well, something like that. You know me, if I commit to something, I commit to it 100%."

"Don't I know it," Danny said.

Steve stood up and walked towards the door. "I've got some paperwork to do, but are you up for lunch later?"

"Yeah, sure. What did you have in mind?"

"I was actually thinking of hitting up a 7-11."

"A 7-11?" Danny chuckled. "What, you want a hot dog now? Maybe get a Big Gulp of Red Bull or better yet, a slurpee?" He pointed at Steve. "You know Kamekona is going to get jealous if you cheat on him with a slurpee machine. Might even kick your new, laid back, out of shape, junk food junkie butt."

Steve grinned. "I'm not worried yet. And I don't want a hot dog, or a slurpee, but those spam musubis they're always advertising look really good."

Danny laughed incredulously and threw his hands up in the air. "A spam musubi? Those gross looking things they have on the posters in the store windows? Seriously? _ That's_ what you want? I get the malasadas, 'cause they rock, but a _spam musubi_? I mean, it's _spam_! And even worse, it's _spam_ wrapped in _seaweed_!"

Steve chuckled and paused as he walked out Danny's office door. "True. But I always wanted to try one. So, here's my chance. I'll even let you drive us there."

Danny smiled and called after Steve's retreating back. "You know, I could really get used to this new, laid-back, non-control freak Steve!"

Steve responded by waving his hand behind his head as he entered his own office.

Danny shook his head, licked the sugar off his fingers, and looked at the remaining malasadas. If Steve could try something new, so could he. And if Steve could find it within himself to eat worse, well, then Danny could find it within him to eat better.

He stood, picked up the malasadas, and walked over to Chin's office.

Chin was sitting at his desk, Kono looking over his shoulder at the computer screen.

"Hey guys." Danny said as he walked in and laid the box on Chin's desk. "I thought I'd share."

Chin opened the box and smiled, helping himself. "It was nice of you to bring these, Danny."

"Actually, Steve brought them. He ate some of them too."

Chin's eyebrows shot up. "Steve ate malasadas? That seems… strange."

"Yeah, it does." Danny replied, nodding. "But he told me he was trying to loosen up and not be such a control freak. He even slept late today and skipped his morning swim."

Chin and Kono exchanged curious glances.

"Is he sick?" Chin asked, suspiciously eyeing the malasada in his hand.

"No, I asked the same thing. He said he wasn't, that he's just taking baby steps and trying new things. He even wants to get a spam musubi for lunch, of all things." Danny continued.

Kono furrowed her eyebrows and tilted her head. "Steve is going to eat_ spam_?"

"Yeah, I know. He even said he would let me drive on the way over there."

Danny appeared lost in thought for a moment, then smiled and nodded to himself. "But maybe he's starting to listen to me. Maybe it's all sinking in. Finally. Maybe I will have a normal human being for a partner, instead of, well… Steve."

As Danny talked, Kono and Chin exchanged silent glances, their looks shifting in mere seconds from confused, to knowing, to amused.

"Um, brah," Kono asked, "did Steve say why he picked today to start?"

Danny shook his head. "No. Just said he decided last night and started this morning. Why?"

"Do you know what day today is?" she asked.

"Sure, it's Friday."

"No." Chin shook his head and then pointed to the calendar on his wall. "She means what is today's _date_."

Danny glanced at the calendar. "Sure, it's April…" Danny's voice trailed off and his jaw grew taut. "I'm going to kill him. I am going to kill him!"

Danny jumped up out of the chair and stalked out of Chin's office. Chin and Kono followed closely behind, grinning at each other.

Danny yanked open the door to Steve's office and stormed in. Chin and Kono paused, wisely, just inside, and leaned on each side of the doorframe.

Steve looked up from his paperwork at his desk, smiling broadly. "Yes, Danny, may I help you?"

"You!" Danny exclaimed, pointing to Steve. "You made me think you recognized your crazy control issues! You made me think you were changing! You made me think you were going to be _normal_!"

"I am normal."

"No, no you are_ not_ normal! Normal people are_ nice_! Normal people do not _torture their partners_! Normal people do not play _mean tricks on their friends_!"

"Oh, come on," Steve smiled, "it wasn't that mean. And I did bring you breakfast."

Danny threw his hands up in the air. "Like that makes up for everything!"

"Well, maybe not everything, but it should help."

Danny paced in front of Steve's desk for a minute, jaw and fists clenched, until he finally blew out a large breath, deflated.

"You're a sadist, you know that, right?" he said.

Steve was still grinning. "So, how'd you figure it out?"

Danny scowled. "I looked at the calendar."

"You know, I thought you'd do that while I was in your office. What made you finally look?"

Danny crossed his arms over his chest and looked down at the ground for a moment before responding. "Chin and Kono told me to look," he mumbled.

"What was that?" Steve asked, leaning forward. "I couldn't hear you."

Danny sighed heavily and spoke louder. "Chin and Kono told me to look."

Steve laughed.

Danny continued to scowl at the ground.

"Traitors," Steve called to the cousins, both still leaning in the doorway.

"What can I say?" Kono grinned. "We felt sorry for him."

"He totally fell for it, didn't he?" Steve snickered.

"So," Danny huffed, glaring at Steve. "The whole thing was all an act? None of it was true?"

"Nope. None of it."

"You didn't sleep late?"

Steve shook his head.

"You didn't skip your swim?"

Steve shook his head again.

"But you did get in late. I was here at 8:00, and you didn't get in until 8:15."

"Actually, I got here at 6:30. Then I went out around 7:45 for the malasadas. The line at Leonard's was a little longer than I thought it would be, so I was a few minutes late getting back. That's all. But it did play in nicely to the plan."

"Humph." Danny grunted. He thought for a second, then pointing an accusing finger at Steve. "Well, you can't deny you ate some malasadas. The box was half empty and I saw you wiping sugar off your face."

"I only bought half a box to begin with. I knew you'd think I ate some, especially if I planted evidence on my face."

Danny frowned and thought for another minute, his face clearly expressing the detective gears that were turning inside his head.

"So," Danny finally asked, "where did the sugar come from?"

Steve looked startled. "What?"

"The sugar. On your face." Danny repeated. "Where did it come from if you didn't eat a malasada?"

"Oh," Steve said, looking down, suddenly interested in the papers on his desk. "Well, I touched one of them to my mouth. Then I threw it away."

Danny raised his eyebrows and a grin slowly spread across his face.

"Let me get this straight… you, Steven McGarrett, _kissed_ a malasada?"

Chin and Kono snickered from the doorway.

Steve frowned up at them, then looked at Danny and replied curtly. "No, Danny. I did not _kiss_ a malasada."

"Yeah, you're right," Danny continued smugly, folding his arms over his chest. "To get that much sugar all over your face, you'd have to practically _make out_ with a malasada."

"I did not _make out_ with a malasada," Steve growled, his voice low.

"Steve and a malasada, sitting in a tree…" Danny sang cheerfully.

Chin and Kono could no longer hold it in and burst out laughing.

"K-I-S-S-I-N-G…" Danny continued singing.

"You do kind of deserve it, Boss," Kono laughed.

"First comes love, then comes…"

"Danny- just stop it already," Steve said loudly, rising up out of his chair and placing his hands on his hips.

"Why?"

"Because it's not true, it's immature, and you're driving me crazy."

Danny rolled his eyes. "Like you playing a joke on me was so mature. And like you don't drive me crazy every day. But, I can be the bigger man."

Steve started to protest, but Danny held up his hand.

"Let me finish. I'll make you a deal. I'll stop singing, but only if you give me something in return."

Steve folded his arms over his chest, shifted his weight, and narrowed his eyes. "What do you want?"

"I want to drive the car for the rest of the month. All the time."

"No way," Steve shook his head.

"Ok, then," Danny turned his head and looked at Chin and Kono, "where was I again?"

"I think you were up to marriage," Chin chimed in.

Steve scowled even more.

"Right. Marriage," Danny said and then shifted into song. "First comes love, then comes marriage…"

"Ok, ok." Steve held his hands up in surrender. "I'll let you drive. All the time. But only for a week."

"Deal." Danny smiled triumphantly.

"Fine," Steve huffed as he sat back down in his chair. "Now will you all get out of here so I can get some work done?"

"Sure thing," Danny said, as he, Kono, and Chin all turned around and walked out of Steve's office, back towards their own.

"I've gotta hand it to you, Danny," Chin said, his voice low so Steve would not overhear, "that was pretty slick."

"No kidding," Kono added. "You totally played him."

Danny smirked. "I have to admit, that was pretty fun. And you were right before, Kono- he totally deserved it."

"Are you really going to drive the car all week?" Kono asked. "You know it'll put him in a bad mood."

Danny nodded. "Actually, it will put him in an incredibly bad mood. Especially since the driver gets to pick the music."

Chin shook his head, grinning. "That will really send him over the edge."

Danny chuckled. "Maybe. But it will be good for him. And I'm not completely heartless. I'll wait a day or two before I break out a Bon Jovi CD."

"So, baby steps, huh?" Chin asked.

Danny smiled. "Exactly."

_Fin _

*************************************H50*************************************

A/Ns: Anyone in the mood for a malasada now? Me too. The spam musubi, not so much. No matter what officer bob says, it cannot be a $1.29 well spent. (and thanks verifying the local cuisine, bob.) :)

And I have to tell you guys, I had a blast writing a story. I hope you all enjoyed it too and happy April Fool's Day! :D


End file.
